Hallo Panta!
Der Text macht mir einen ganz guten Eindruck... (:-)
Dennoch ein paar Anmerkungen:
(1) ich würde sagen: Westminster which is the seat of government
(2) history museaum > history museum
(3) There were so beautiful music and good artists. > Vorschlag: There were good artists and so beautyful music to hear.
(4) foodstand > food stand - oder: food stall
(5) that had beene (!!) closed in 1976, so many people were jobless. > that had been closed in 1976. Many people lost their jobs at that time.
(6) walish ?? - Google hat bei diesem Wort auf Suaheli getippt (:-))
Meinst du 'walisisch' = Welsh ? -
I am happy to see the walish, interesting things! > klingt für mich etwas eigenartig. Wie lautet der Gedanke auf Deutsch?
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(7) That was so stupid of me. > Vorschlag: It was so stupid of me to do that.
(8) where I say a DVD > where I saw a DVD
(9) and I knew that > Vorschlag, hier einen neuen Satz zu beginnen: I knew that ...
(10) loves Sherlock Holmes so I > loves Sherlock Holmes, so I (ein Komma zum Luftholen)
(11) In that moment I only wanted to have > Vorschlag: In that moment, all I wanted was to have ...
(12) becasue (the store detectives) > because ...
(13) to come with them but they ... > ich empfehle kürzere Sätze. ... to come with them. But they ...
(14) But they were unable to find anything > But they could not find the DVD (/ a stolen object). So we were allowed to leave the shop. (PUNKT)!
(15) I know that I'll never in my life repeat this. > I know that I will never do this again in my whole life.
Ciao, Tamy.
